I grew up in New Castle, Delaware until I was 8 and then went back every year at least once to see my father, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins-we were the only ones who ever moved away. It is also very historical, and visiting is always an odd combination of familiarity, like having comfort food, but also experiencing how nothing's the same. New Castle is gentrified, but the river is there, the old library where I had my first card at age 5, the bank where my grandmother worked, the old William-Penn-landed-here bricked streets by the wharf. It's always a welcome sojourn back in time, a chance to see cousins that I don't get to see very often now and to walk the street where I used to have my house, then the convent and the movie theatre right across, then--crossing the street--he post office where my father worked as a mailman, my school and my church on the next corner. I was held in those eight years by Old New Castle and a large extended family.
I loved this. Boston is my hometown, too, and I lived there until I was 45. For 23 years I’ve been in Europe. Whenever I come back to beantown it feels almost as strange as if I’d entered a place I had never been to before. Thomas Wolfe had a good point: “you can’t go home again”.
Such a thoughtful and thought-provoking piece. I often drive by the country road where I lived with my second husband before he was killed in a car crash forty years ago. It still hurts.
Great post. Thank you. It makes me think we need to do more social media travel posts showing the overrunning of hot tourism spots rather than posts of the sweet, maybe unknown places we find. Social media is ruining travel. Somehow we need to find our way back to sharing travel without it being a popularity contest.
Diana, this is lovely. It makes me very glad that you decided to create a Substack and populate it with whatever you feel like. When I was in my early twenties I couldn't wait to get out of Youngstown, OH--a place presidential candidates visit every four years to promise revitalization, never to be seen again until the next election cycle. But now, decades later, I have such a deep nostalgia for it and soak up every moment I can when I go "home" to visit my only sibling who never left. Great idea for an essay! Thanks!
Oh, thank you! Even when the place doesn't change much, we change, and then we love what we once couldn't wait to get away from. (Works the other way around, too, doesn't it?)
I remember the Tomorrow Club in Youngstown that had the greatest live music! I moved out to Oregon & have been here 40 years & on my street is a musician that used to play at the Tomorrow Club who arrived here in this town also 40 years ago. Small world
About the time the steel mills were starting to go …my boyfriend worked at one after college in Youngstown & became addicted to speed, black beauties, as I remember they worked 12 hour shifts? So much excellent music !
I grew up in a boring suburb I was glad to leave behind. But after I turned it into a cute Dutch village in one of my novels, my attitude changed somewhat and now I can see the place had its charms.
I enjoyed reading this. I grew up on the Upper West Side of Manhattan in a rent-controlled apartment where my mother still lives. It had been a cheap place my bohemian parents could afford in the 60’s. I moved to Moscow and was able to find the same bohemian world that disappeared from the Upper West Side. A world of educated people not making much money and where books and ideas were taken seriously. As a gay young male the streets held possibility of sexual conquest that made the city exciting.
I was just in Boston last week! My first trip was 30 years ago and I remembered little of it minus the harrowing traffic
I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago. 5 years ago I went back to see the little white house I grew up in. 40 years later it had an addition piled on its roof and still it was dwarfed by the McMansions that had been built up next to it. Bleh. It’s true you can’t go home again!
Loved this! I've been spending a month+ the last 2-3 summers in Boston with plans to move back next year once my son goes to college. But so much has changed since I lived there the last two times (93-95, 2004-6). I feel like I need to find new places and new memories. I had exactly the same experience in Salem as you too. I hear that people now leave for the entire month of October! I couldn't help but wonder if there isn't a juicy story about why that town has been so transformed...
OMG…I *just* last night returned west from Salem (I grew up in Marblehead), where I spent the last two weeks for the holidays. My family owns The Salem Inn—yes, kitty corner from The Witch House. I, too, am stunned by the magnitude of change—tour groups of 20-40 tromping around town at night after lantern-bearing guides; Halloween gone crazy, morphing into a two-month long affair; ghostbusters doing lives from their haunted rooms at our Inn. This, for the wonderful and sleepy little North Shore communities of my childhood. While there’s some shine, it’s mostly heartbreak.
Paul revere is a loser and I stand by it
Fie! Ssss!
You have just made this trip to Boston even more exciting and interesting than I thought it was when we were there. Love this!
Boston - still one of the best cities in the U.S.
Definitely one of the best. Just crowded!
I grew up in New Castle, Delaware until I was 8 and then went back every year at least once to see my father, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins-we were the only ones who ever moved away. It is also very historical, and visiting is always an odd combination of familiarity, like having comfort food, but also experiencing how nothing's the same. New Castle is gentrified, but the river is there, the old library where I had my first card at age 5, the bank where my grandmother worked, the old William-Penn-landed-here bricked streets by the wharf. It's always a welcome sojourn back in time, a chance to see cousins that I don't get to see very often now and to walk the street where I used to have my house, then the convent and the movie theatre right across, then--crossing the street--he post office where my father worked as a mailman, my school and my church on the next corner. I was held in those eight years by Old New Castle and a large extended family.
You manage to make Delaware sound dreamy!
I loved this. Boston is my hometown, too, and I lived there until I was 45. For 23 years I’ve been in Europe. Whenever I come back to beantown it feels almost as strange as if I’d entered a place I had never been to before. Thomas Wolfe had a good point: “you can’t go home again”.
Hi Kiki. "You can't go home again," indeed.
Such a thoughtful and thought-provoking piece. I often drive by the country road where I lived with my second husband before he was killed in a car crash forty years ago. It still hurts.
Oh, gosh, I didn’t know you lived near it. Hugs. xx
Great post. Thank you. It makes me think we need to do more social media travel posts showing the overrunning of hot tourism spots rather than posts of the sweet, maybe unknown places we find. Social media is ruining travel. Somehow we need to find our way back to sharing travel without it being a popularity contest.
Instagram is really not helping the problem (and maybe is the problem?).
Diana, this is lovely. It makes me very glad that you decided to create a Substack and populate it with whatever you feel like. When I was in my early twenties I couldn't wait to get out of Youngstown, OH--a place presidential candidates visit every four years to promise revitalization, never to be seen again until the next election cycle. But now, decades later, I have such a deep nostalgia for it and soak up every moment I can when I go "home" to visit my only sibling who never left. Great idea for an essay! Thanks!
Oh, thank you! Even when the place doesn't change much, we change, and then we love what we once couldn't wait to get away from. (Works the other way around, too, doesn't it?)
I remember the Tomorrow Club in Youngstown that had the greatest live music! I moved out to Oregon & have been here 40 years & on my street is a musician that used to play at the Tomorrow Club who arrived here in this town also 40 years ago. Small world
What?! I love this. 🥹
Wow this is incredible. I vaguely remember the Tomorrow Club. Youngstown had it going on back in the day.
About the time the steel mills were starting to go …my boyfriend worked at one after college in Youngstown & became addicted to speed, black beauties, as I remember they worked 12 hour shifts? So much excellent music !
Nice.
Love you.
"At 18, you can still adjust the stories in your brain without grieving." - WOW.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
I grew up in a boring suburb I was glad to leave behind. But after I turned it into a cute Dutch village in one of my novels, my attitude changed somewhat and now I can see the place had its charms.
I love that! You made it interesting.
I enjoyed reading this. I grew up on the Upper West Side of Manhattan in a rent-controlled apartment where my mother still lives. It had been a cheap place my bohemian parents could afford in the 60’s. I moved to Moscow and was able to find the same bohemian world that disappeared from the Upper West Side. A world of educated people not making much money and where books and ideas were taken seriously. As a gay young male the streets held possibility of sexual conquest that made the city exciting.
I've never thought of Moscow as Bohemian. Love that.
I was just in Boston last week! My first trip was 30 years ago and I remembered little of it minus the harrowing traffic
I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago. 5 years ago I went back to see the little white house I grew up in. 40 years later it had an addition piled on its roof and still it was dwarfed by the McMansions that had been built up next to it. Bleh. It’s true you can’t go home again!
I saw your Boston pics on Facebook and was sad that I had just left and we couldn't meet up!
Loved this! I've been spending a month+ the last 2-3 summers in Boston with plans to move back next year once my son goes to college. But so much has changed since I lived there the last two times (93-95, 2004-6). I feel like I need to find new places and new memories. I had exactly the same experience in Salem as you too. I hear that people now leave for the entire month of October! I couldn't help but wonder if there isn't a juicy story about why that town has been so transformed...
Oh, that is a very interesting theory. Maybe we should start digging….
OMG…I *just* last night returned west from Salem (I grew up in Marblehead), where I spent the last two weeks for the holidays. My family owns The Salem Inn—yes, kitty corner from The Witch House. I, too, am stunned by the magnitude of change—tour groups of 20-40 tromping around town at night after lantern-bearing guides; Halloween gone crazy, morphing into a two-month long affair; ghostbusters doing lives from their haunted rooms at our Inn. This, for the wonderful and sleepy little North Shore communities of my childhood. While there’s some shine, it’s mostly heartbreak.
I was honestly stunned. Salem is still so beautiful, though.
Yes and yes!